Bees in My Bonnet

 I'm going to let a bee fly out of my bonnet just now, so brace yourself. The term 'Best Practice' annoys me. It annoys me A LOT. It has burned me. I've used it myself; I've had it promoted to me. I've seen it in research, in literature, in pseudo-guru-speak jargon. And now I think I finally have the courage to push back. Hang On a minute!! Isn't 'Best Practice' automatically, by its very literal nature, completely warranted as acceptable? Doesn't everyone want to follow 'Best Practice' in every situation? Actually, No. No, we don't. And I'll tell you why. Because it's arrogant, proud, assuming, and lacking in nuance. It lacks a 'here and now' understanding of things. Sure, there's probably times where 'best practice' is helpful. If you are a clinician of some sort, and following a static experimental process; if you are a professional whose work is to follow exacting procedures, fine, go ahead, and consult...

 When I was at the worst part of covid last year, I could barely keep awake and when I was awake, I had no mental stamina to read or concentrate on anything. I couldn't listen to a narrative, or I'd get lost. My mind felt numb and consumed with the pain going on in seemingly every part of my body. So I went to BibleGateway.com and started to listen to Psalms. I have been memorizing Psalm 119, so I listen to it routinely. I've made my own voice recording but I hadn't a year ago so I was still using the online Bible Gateway version, in the ESV. Because I wanted to focus on Psalm 119, and I often was tossing or turning for a few minutes beforehand, I would back it up to a few chapters earlier. Sometimes I'd start at 113, or 115. I wasn't necessarily focusing on the words - simply letting them fall into the air and pick up a phrase here or there which might settle in my soul.  Somehow, in some way, my mind was clear enough at one point to actually hear  what Psalm 1...

  I'd like to think I've repented many times in my life.  In a theological sense, we do repent when we come to Christ - and this does bring us to a place of having a relationship with the Living God. But it seems many think of this as the end-point of repentance. That, having considered ourselves sinners, and in need of the mercy of God, we say, 'God, I agree I'm a sinner, please forgive me and save me.' And it ends there. It seems it is easier to think of ourselves in that big general sense of  'SINNER' than to actually take a look inward (and perhaps outward, depending) and see the actual sins that make us feel icky and low and dejected inside. At least, on some occasions we feel that. On others we may feel like, 'Hey, I recognize these things are wrong, but I don't feel very icky about it, though I think I probably should.' Even that sentiment has a hint of repentance, as we observe ourselves and see the incongruity between what we claim to be...

 I've been told orange is the colour of forgiveness. That may well be so - it is also the colour of the protestants in Ireland, The colour of inmate suits who reckon with the reality, Or lack, Of forgiveness. The Protestants hailed William of Orange,  And I wonder what they learned of forgiveness. I used to say when people commented on my red hair that, "It isn't red. It really is orange." And then they called me Ginger. And I thought about Ginger and was confused: Ginger is tan on the outside and pasty yellow-white inside. My skin is pasty-yellow-white.  My hair used to be orange, And now just looks like a dull tan,  So perhaps Ginger fits after all. Orange stands in contrast to almost all other colours. In fashion, nothing seems to match it. It requires courage to wear, or even to paint walls orange. Perhaps that's why it's the colour of forgiveness. It takes courage to forgive. To wear the orange jump-suit which seems to shout: "I need forgiveness....

This is an anonymous posting from a trusted Missionary Pastor that I know.  He teaches the Bible to many, and often has occasion to teach on marriage from a Biblical perspective.  I will share these with you for your edification and growth. THOUGHTS ON  SUBMISSION QUESTION:  In light of these verses (see below) is the submission of  husbands and wives supposed to be   50 – 50, or 60 for wives and 40 for husbands, OR some other combination such  as 90 – 10 with wives submitting  90% of the time or should wives submit  100% and husbands not at all? From Ephesians: 22 Wives,  submit  to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should  submit  in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up fo...

I was following up with some comments about my recent Forgiveness rant, Part 1  and  Part 2 ...  And there were parts I left out that I need to mention.  My source said not to quote him, so I will quote him without citing him.  He said that there are only five words that apply to this discussion. 5 Words. What are those words?  Scroll down please.... WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY? Yup - What does the Bible say? I said, 'What about if I'm not sorry enough - or if I'm really sorry and trying to enter into the other's pain that I have somehow caused, and they don't feel my genuine sorrow or remorse?  What then?  Am I beholden to the yoke of their anger and unforgiveness?'  He said, 'No - you forgive them for not forgiving you and move on.' "But what if I'm not sorry enough?  What if I come across as ingenuine?  What if they can't feel my repentance?" "It doesn't matter ...

In my first post I was basically talking to/about the person who withholds forgiveness.  Now I want to talk to the one who is denied being forgiven. If you have apologized and asked forgiveness - once - not many times, not in repeated trials to demonstrate enough penance - ONCE, then you have done your part. You ARE forgiven - by God.  And He, after all, is really the only One Who matters.  It is sad, and a terrible grief to bear - that others refuse to forgive.  This is a matter they have between them and God.  You are free - free from the burden to work to pay for your sins.  You are free to live before God with the knowledge of HIS grace, HIS mercy, HIS forgiveness.  You are free to worship because you embrace the Gospel. You are not beholden to some checklist of works-righteousness that wins you the salvation you have already received! You are not subject to the faulty view others have of you! You are not guilty because another deems you...

I am going to address this from a certain angle and I don't want my readers to be confused.  I am not speaking here of forgiveness of grievous, outright obviously sinful atrocities committed against you or which you have committed.  This is not the kind of forgiveness I am addressing, though perhaps some thoughts will apply.  I am talking about when others harbour bitterness, anger, resentment, and an ongoing refusal to grant forgiveness especially regarding their perceived ( valid or otherwise ) injustices. We all hurt others in our lives regularly.  Some of these matters are actually sinful and wrong.  Many are not - we are simply dealing with overly sensitive, self-centered individuals who nurse conjured up wounds that were never actually inflicted.  When we deal with these kinds of people (though we'd rather not, frankly) it is fair to offer an apology - whether it is actually warranted or not.  In my opinion, this is a matter of extending grace...

I don't generally struggle with unforgiveness.  But lest I speak too soon, I've had a bout of it lately.  And as the days pass and my demeanor improves I am feeling a bit like how I felt when recovering from the flu last month. And it hit me:  Unforgiveness is like the flu. You see, when I had the flu last month, I was miserable. I found it hard to sleep because I was achy and sore and stuffy.  But sleep was what I really wanted and needed.  But the pain in my bones kept me uptight and unrelaxed making sleep very difficult. Unforgiveness has done the same thing to me.  It made me uptight.  Unrelaxed.  Fidgety.  Unable to sleep. The flu made me miserable.  Unforgiveness did the same. Also, the flu is highly contagious. I would venture to say that unforgiveness also breeds itself in seedy environments where festering, brooding and spill-over occurs.  When others catch a whiff of your bitter insolence it plants toxic see...

How To Forgive I realize I tend to just muse out loud here on my blog, and sometimes I just throw my thoughts out, drop them like a bomb and run for cover. Sometimes I fail to address how some of my observations can be remedied. After writing the last bit I thought, 'Okay, I've said my bit, had my gripe about lack of forgiveness, and could say lots more, but some people genuinely struggle to forgive. What hope have I offered them?' And I repented and decided to write some more. How can we forgive - big things or little things? I believe there are two main ingredients that must precursor forgiveness. Take a look at the following verse: “If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, ‘I repent,’ forgive him.” The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!” from Luke 17 Now, let's for a moment lay aside the part of the repentance - because much of...

I was thinking again on this subject and had more thoughts to share. I write this blog from an entirely Christian, Bible-based perspective. I just want to clarify that before I begin, because I know I have a wide range of readers who may or may not agree with my beliefs about God, the world and us who inhabit it! Regardless, I am thankful and honoured to share my thoughts about matters that apply to all of us, no matter how we encounter God in our lives. I do believe that He seeks to draw all of us to Himself by His great mercy and love. Because of His great love for us, He calls His children to forgive. This is a high order for some, but when a follower of Christ really considers it, it is not such a big deal. We would like to think it is, but that is merely a form of nursing wounds. Forgiveness is puzzling to consider when we look at the foundations of our western culture - it's values, core beliefs and traditions. It is a counter-cultural idea to most all cultures, b...