When Forgiveness Is Denied (Part 2)

In my first post I was basically talking to/about the person who withholds forgiveness.  Now I want to talk to the one who is denied being forgiven.

If you have apologized and asked forgiveness - once - not many times, not in repeated trials to demonstrate enough penance - ONCE, then you have done your part.

You ARE forgiven - by God.  And He, after all, is really the only One Who matters.  It is sad, and a terrible grief to bear - that others refuse to forgive.  This is a matter they have between them and God.  You are free - free from the burden to work to pay for your sins.  You are free to live before God with the knowledge of HIS grace, HIS mercy, HIS forgiveness.  You are free to worship because you embrace the Gospel.

You are not beholden to some checklist of works-righteousness that wins you the salvation you have already received!

You are not subject to the faulty view others have of you!

You are not guilty because another deems you so!

You are not what others think of you!

You are a redeemed child of God Who welcomes you knowing you are fallen, imperfect, and yet His precious child.

He loves you.

He forgives you.

You are released from the burden of guilt others wish to place upon you.  Jesus took your burdens on Himself, and for others to try to enslave you to a yoke of works-righteousness would be beneath you as a child of the King.

You have been freed.

Now go live in that freedom and insulate yourself, as much as within your power to do, from grace-denying, forgivness-withholding, gospel-rejecting, toxic people.

You probably have to live with them to an extent.  But as much as possible, live in the grace of God and recognize others have their hang-ups and that is God's business to deal with.  Just don't accept the baggage they wish to place on you - to attempt to enslave you to their will, and not God's.

Be free from imposed burdens, that God never intended for you.


  1. Sarah, I so appreciate your willingness to initiate communication on these kinds of tough, VERY REAL topics! The withholding of forgiveness is a very hurtful reality, that does need to be addressed! In fact, it is excruciating to experience, when we do experience it. I was thinking just today, about the fact that it often takes experiencing these kinds of things, for us to become aware of the FACT that we surely do NOT want to do that to anyone... Not even to that person who refuses to forgive us! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. One thing I would add, is the fact that often we are still blaming them for what happened, in our hearts, so that our confession of our wrong, does not come across to the other person as being sincere, but rather as being duty driven, or a religious ritual, rather than real. We/I take their sin against me VERY seriously, but we do not take our OWN sin against them very seriously at all... We ignore, or take our sins against them very lightly in fact! We are often oblivious to the very real pain that we caused them. They can very much sense this in our "confession," or our "apology" ... This greatly affects a person's motivation to forgive us.

    To be totally honest, I have found that when I choose to "insulate myself, as much as within my power to do, from grace-denying, forgivness-withholding, gospel-rejecting, toxic people," is often my own toxic, unforgiving, gospel-rejecting, bitter, vengeful response...

    Thank you so much again, Sarah, for risking initiating these kinds of important discussions about the truths of God's ways! Elaine

    (I don't know how to do this profile thing, except with Anonymous.) :)


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I get by with a little help from my friends (Gratitude: day 11)

Invoice for Kids

Exercising Gratitude: 30 Days - 1