Exercising Gratitude: 30 Days - 2
Today I am thankful for my husband, Sam.
As I was reflecting on this post, I thought to myself, "Yeah, that's so generic...everyone is grateful for their husband, more or less." And well they should be, I suppose (depending).
But so what it's predictable and typical. I'm still grateful for him. I don't know that anyone else could've married me - seen all my weaknesses and failures and tough it out, work together, grow in acceptance and love and continue to honour the commitment of marriage. Now, lest you think I am unreasonably self-deprecating...I am aware I have a few strengths too. Just many of my strengths aren't super applicable to house-keeping and parenting (some surely are - but a hot-temper is a liability in the parenting department I daresay). And I know I am a free-spirit and poetic, mystical, easy-going and not a control-freak (see - there are a few strengths). But to marry an engineer, who doesn't typically revel in the free-spiritedness and mystical poetic, theological/philosophical musings of his wife, it is all that more of a big deal that he has toughed it out with me. Sam is a man of unwavering commitment, passionate godliness and untiring drive to make use of his gifts in service to God and others.
I see that every day. He is self-sacrificing, patient, efficient and talented with all things mechanical. I am so thankful that he is able to manage household stuff often saving us money and blessing us with his creativity. He recently built a bed for Andrew that has a hidden staircase at the back (or is it a ladder?) to the 'roof' of it where there is a play area - but first you must crawl through the tunnel underneath where there are piles of books and blankets.
We have had some very rough times together. Our first 5 years were fairly miserable. Maybe more than fairly - 'plainly miserable' would better describe it. I was a putz and he was annoyed. I had flaws and he had perfection (sort of, not really). We wrestled with each other's hard-headed personalities. I was brutal on his ego - cold-hearted, and super demeaning. He was frustrated because I was slow to (if ever) change and was totally disorganized and a messy house-keeper, talked too much, impulsive about most everything, scatter-brained and majorly distracted. Most of these things are still true, just he seems to be at peace with the person I am, and I have actually changed a lot, just I know I'll never be at a point of 'super-house-keeper-diva', nor do I really aim to be (I'll forever be working towards change and progress, but at some point I have to see perfection is not probably attainable without major interventions/assistance a.k.a. house-cleaning service, which, other than my support staff, isn't happening any time soon). (Support staff otherwise known as 'in-laws').
I have watched Sam grow in wisdom, patience, acceptance and kindness. His parenting style has changed along with mine, as we re-assess and realize we need to see our kids as actual human beings with hearts of flesh, not robots to be programmed. Sam faithfully serves others in our community - neighbours who need help here and there as well as needs that arise in Church. I say he does the work of 10 men - and this is no exaggeration.
Sam inspires me because he wastes no time in all of life. I mean that. I don't know how he has stamina for that. He is purposeful about what he does with all his waking hours and purposeful about getting enough sleeping hours in too. He is steady, and dilligent, and yet takes time to reach out to others and be a genuine friend.
This summer he performed the wedding for some friends of ours who were getting married. We were blessed to meet with them over the preceding months to go through marriage counselling materials together. This was a fun process and in many ways re-invigorated our union - as we explored things a young couple starting out together might need to know, we were reminded how much work goes in to making a marriage great, and how much reward there is in it. When starting out you just hang on, work at it and hope for the best. But years down the road you look back and say, 'Oh, that was a good move, glad we worked on that then...things are so much better now.' Or you look back and say, 'Oh, I wish we had figured that out sooner!'
So, today, even if it's predictable, I am thankful for Sam. And I hope to continue to be for many more years to come.
As I was reflecting on this post, I thought to myself, "Yeah, that's so generic...everyone is grateful for their husband, more or less." And well they should be, I suppose (depending).
But so what it's predictable and typical. I'm still grateful for him. I don't know that anyone else could've married me - seen all my weaknesses and failures and tough it out, work together, grow in acceptance and love and continue to honour the commitment of marriage. Now, lest you think I am unreasonably self-deprecating...I am aware I have a few strengths too. Just many of my strengths aren't super applicable to house-keeping and parenting (some surely are - but a hot-temper is a liability in the parenting department I daresay). And I know I am a free-spirit and poetic, mystical, easy-going and not a control-freak (see - there are a few strengths). But to marry an engineer, who doesn't typically revel in the free-spiritedness and mystical poetic, theological/philosophical musings of his wife, it is all that more of a big deal that he has toughed it out with me. Sam is a man of unwavering commitment, passionate godliness and untiring drive to make use of his gifts in service to God and others.
I see that every day. He is self-sacrificing, patient, efficient and talented with all things mechanical. I am so thankful that he is able to manage household stuff often saving us money and blessing us with his creativity. He recently built a bed for Andrew that has a hidden staircase at the back (or is it a ladder?) to the 'roof' of it where there is a play area - but first you must crawl through the tunnel underneath where there are piles of books and blankets.
We have had some very rough times together. Our first 5 years were fairly miserable. Maybe more than fairly - 'plainly miserable' would better describe it. I was a putz and he was annoyed. I had flaws and he had perfection (sort of, not really). We wrestled with each other's hard-headed personalities. I was brutal on his ego - cold-hearted, and super demeaning. He was frustrated because I was slow to (if ever) change and was totally disorganized and a messy house-keeper, talked too much, impulsive about most everything, scatter-brained and majorly distracted. Most of these things are still true, just he seems to be at peace with the person I am, and I have actually changed a lot, just I know I'll never be at a point of 'super-house-keeper-diva', nor do I really aim to be (I'll forever be working towards change and progress, but at some point I have to see perfection is not probably attainable without major interventions/assistance a.k.a. house-cleaning service, which, other than my support staff, isn't happening any time soon). (Support staff otherwise known as 'in-laws').
I have watched Sam grow in wisdom, patience, acceptance and kindness. His parenting style has changed along with mine, as we re-assess and realize we need to see our kids as actual human beings with hearts of flesh, not robots to be programmed. Sam faithfully serves others in our community - neighbours who need help here and there as well as needs that arise in Church. I say he does the work of 10 men - and this is no exaggeration.
Sam inspires me because he wastes no time in all of life. I mean that. I don't know how he has stamina for that. He is purposeful about what he does with all his waking hours and purposeful about getting enough sleeping hours in too. He is steady, and dilligent, and yet takes time to reach out to others and be a genuine friend.
This summer he performed the wedding for some friends of ours who were getting married. We were blessed to meet with them over the preceding months to go through marriage counselling materials together. This was a fun process and in many ways re-invigorated our union - as we explored things a young couple starting out together might need to know, we were reminded how much work goes in to making a marriage great, and how much reward there is in it. When starting out you just hang on, work at it and hope for the best. But years down the road you look back and say, 'Oh, that was a good move, glad we worked on that then...things are so much better now.' Or you look back and say, 'Oh, I wish we had figured that out sooner!'
So, today, even if it's predictable, I am thankful for Sam. And I hope to continue to be for many more years to come.
Comments
Post a Comment